Well hello once again my little reader friends,
Everyone alright? Good. What about you lot at the back?
This little piece of madness, as you might have guessed from the title, is about the supporting characters that shine out of the little box in the corner of the room. Or wherever you put your tele these days. And it might not be so much of a box anymore. Might be more a flat screen. And it might not be so little either. Seriously, on my so far one and only trip to the Braehead shopping centre (more on that later) I saw a tv that was roughly the size of my flat. You could lay it down on the ground with the screen facing upwards, switch it on and the international space station could probably see what you were watching. But more on that later.
We're talking sidekicks and supporting characters.
The friend of the hero. The dependable one. The stalwart comrade.
Now I'm going to name a few of my favourites here. You may notice a common theme in that they are all women. So this little thread could also be called 'The Horn Factor' and yes, there may well be a few of you out there who will deem this to be sexist.
Tough.
It's my blog so there.
Anyway, we're talking about (and these are just from the tele):
Willow (Buffy The Vampire Slayer)
Gabrielle (Xena: Warrior Princess)
Amy Pond (Doctor Who)
Annie Cartwright (Life On Mars. The British version)
Maid Marion (to be exact Lucy Griffiths in the BBC version of Robin Hood a few years ago)
Agent Simmons (Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D)
Guinevere (Merlin)
So there you are. The lovely ladies that catch the more discerning eye that looks beyond the hero's shenanigans. Though to be the Amy Pond, Annie and Marion choices don't have much competition given that their respective lead characters are all blokes. Well, time lord in Amy's case. But take the case of Willow. She has to put up with both the far more glamorous Buffy and Cordelia. And I still prefer her to the both of them.
I have no idea what this all means and Freud would probably have a field day psycho-analysing these choices but what the hell. They're my choices and I don't care.
Ta ta for now.
Saturday, 29 March 2014
Friday, 7 March 2014
Flash Fiction Friday - Yes its back!
Hello my little reader friends.
Now, are we sitting comfortably. Good then I'll begin.
As you know, my little friends, from time to time I like to entertain you all with a little story that I have wrote using a word supplied from random word generator as the inspiration. Tonight I have had another go.
Stop groaning. You're in this for the long haul so you might as well like it. Besides, I've locked the doors so you can't get out.
As you remember as well, this is the just the first draft as well with no changes being made. Its a fast process designed to get the story on paper.
Anyway, tonight's word was:
Newspaper
And here is the story, entitled 'Read All About it'
Enjoy
------
Now, are we sitting comfortably. Good then I'll begin.
As you know, my little friends, from time to time I like to entertain you all with a little story that I have wrote using a word supplied from random word generator as the inspiration. Tonight I have had another go.
Stop groaning. You're in this for the long haul so you might as well like it. Besides, I've locked the doors so you can't get out.
As you remember as well, this is the just the first draft as well with no changes being made. Its a fast process designed to get the story on paper.
Anyway, tonight's word was:
Newspaper
And here is the story, entitled 'Read All About it'
Enjoy
------
Read
All About It.
Sarah
sat at the kitchen table, her hand absently rubbing it lightly and tears
streaming down her cheeks. No one would believe her. No one should. No one
could. She looked at the newspaper sitting next to the now lukewarm teapot and
the uneaten toast. Sarah had lost her appetite when she had seen the headlines.
It
had started innocently enough a few months earlier. After returning home from
the morning school run Sarah had allowed herself ten minutes with that days newspaper
which had been delivered. The headline that day, in big black bold lettering,
read:
GONE
AT LAST!
MP
in sex, drugs and blackmail scandal resigns.
Sarah
had remembered being puzzled. The MP in question had been the representative
for her constituency and, being an active member of the political party, she
thought she would have heard something before it was reported in the news. Such
a high profile politician would surely have made the television news as well
but there had been nothing. Sarah had put the story out of her mind. Until she
was watching the early evening news a week later when the story was the main
headline. She remembered the look on her husband’s face when she told him she
had seen the story a week earlier. He hadn’t believed her so she had dug out
the newspaper only to find the headline had changed. It had been there she had
insisted. You must have dreamt it he had replied.
That
incident had been forgotten until it happened again. Again after the school run
she had settled down with the paper and a cup of tea and seen the headline.
DISASTER!
Motorway
pile up on Thelwall Viaduct. 30 dead.
Sarah
had looked at the page with horror and dread. There had been no accident. Again
it would have been on the news. Certainly one of that magnitude. Maybe this
time she could do something about it. Warn someone. Prevent this tragedy from occurring.
She glanced at the date on the front page and her eyes widened. She had one
week until the disaster was to take place. She formulated a plan. The night
before she had studied the evening weather forecast. There was to be a lot of
fog in the area in the early hours of the morning which wouldn’t clear until
around midday. She waited until everyone in the house was asleep until she
crept out into the night to make a phone call.
Sarah
had recalled how the accident had still taken place. The call had either been
too late or dismissed as a hoax. Could she have ever prevented it? If not, why
was she being sent these strange messages? Was someone or something just
playing with her head? Was someone sending messages from the future trying to
alter history for the better? And why just to Sarah?
Sarah
wiped the tears from her eyes. There had to be a reason for all of it. This
time she couldn’t fail. The laptop sat a few feet away from her. She needed to
do some digging and quickly so she reached over, brought the machine closer and
switched it on.
Logging
on to the internet she glanced again at the day’s paper with its headline:
DOOMSDAY!
Man-made
virus unleashed. Death toll: 4 billion.
Sunday, 2 March 2014
The smell of the grease paint, the roar of the crowd...
Well hello my little reader friends.
Now lets get serious for a second because I have a confession to make.
*hushed breath from audience*
Now the thing is my little friends, you all know me as a lone wolf, hard as nails, don't cross him, loose cannon type of guy. A mans man. A real tough guy with ice in his veins, gravel in his guts and spit in his eye. Am I right or am I right?
I'm right.
Ok, who sniggered?
Come on, someone sniggered. Right we're not going any further until the person responsible stands up and apologises to the whole class.
*folds arms*
It's your time you're wasting you know.
So it was you was it? See me at the end of class.
Right, so where was I
Well here is the thing. The confession. The revelation that will shake the very universe to its very core.
I like musicals.
Now just let that settle in for a minute. I like musicals. I've been to a few now and will be going to more in the near future. I like them. The whole music, dancing, acting and singing downright fun lot of it.
Its a fairly recent thing started a couple of years ago with 'We Will Rock You' but they are great fun aren't they. I only tell you this now because, yesterday, I went to see 'Happy Days - A New Musical' at the Kings Theatre in Glasgow. And it was rather good. Ok, I'm not sure the bloke playing The Fonz was totally the right choice but you can't have everything. And who doesn't come out of a musical feeling a lot better? They're goddam fun!
Next up is Wicked in a couple of months and I'll be there. Was rather tricky to get a ticket for that one but I managed it. So...
Bring on the Wicked Witch Of The West.
Ta ta for now.
Now lets get serious for a second because I have a confession to make.
*hushed breath from audience*
Now the thing is my little friends, you all know me as a lone wolf, hard as nails, don't cross him, loose cannon type of guy. A mans man. A real tough guy with ice in his veins, gravel in his guts and spit in his eye. Am I right or am I right?
I'm right.
Ok, who sniggered?
Come on, someone sniggered. Right we're not going any further until the person responsible stands up and apologises to the whole class.
*folds arms*
It's your time you're wasting you know.
So it was you was it? See me at the end of class.
Right, so where was I
Well here is the thing. The confession. The revelation that will shake the very universe to its very core.
I like musicals.
Now just let that settle in for a minute. I like musicals. I've been to a few now and will be going to more in the near future. I like them. The whole music, dancing, acting and singing downright fun lot of it.
Its a fairly recent thing started a couple of years ago with 'We Will Rock You' but they are great fun aren't they. I only tell you this now because, yesterday, I went to see 'Happy Days - A New Musical' at the Kings Theatre in Glasgow. And it was rather good. Ok, I'm not sure the bloke playing The Fonz was totally the right choice but you can't have everything. And who doesn't come out of a musical feeling a lot better? They're goddam fun!
Next up is Wicked in a couple of months and I'll be there. Was rather tricky to get a ticket for that one but I managed it. So...
Bring on the Wicked Witch Of The West.
Ta ta for now.
Sunday, 9 February 2014
dum de dum, dum de dum, dum de dum, ooo wee ooo
Hello my little reader friends,
And welcome, once again, to my little five minutes worth of insanity. Or should that be sanity? Well, anyway, you're here now so settle down and I'll begin.
So as you know, I have moved up to Scotland and have settled in Paisley. (If you didn't know, well, you do now. And where have you been?)
Well, as the flat is all sorted and work is going alright, it was time to start meeting new people and make some new friends. And maybe, just maybe, meet my impossible girl to go adventuring through time and space with.
Actually when I say the flat is all sorted, that isn't completely accurate. It's all sorted bar the music system. You see, my little friends, when I moved in I decided that as it's a small flat that a big sound system would look out of place. So I was looking for a small set up that could play the radio, cds and my ipod. Anyway my dad found one that would do all three and said that he and mum would get me it for Christmas (this was back in November/early December last year in case you're about to point out that's only just turned February). So having it got it down south we tried it with his ipod and it worked fine. Now, at this point, some of you are probably thinking that we should have tried my ipod aren't you?
And you'd probably have a point. But as his ipod is an ipod classic and my ipod is also an ipod classic you would think there wouldn't be a problem. After all, ipod is an ipod is an ipod is an ipod... (and so on).
So in the new year I dutifully returned north and plugged my ipod into the docking port on this new system.
You can guess what happened next can't you...
That's right, sod all.
Turns out that only certain makes and models of ipod are supported by this thing... and mine wasn't one of them.
There was a way round it though so I can still play the ipod until I can get a more up to date model. But still.....damn you Apple!! grrrr..
Anyway, where was I?
Oh yeah, impossible girl .
Right, so you lot know I'm a bit of geek right? Yes of course you do. Either that or you've come here by mistake in which case, sit down, make yourself comfortable, and start your catch up reading.
So I've started to look for groups similar to those interests that I was involved with down south (still feels a bit weird calling an area in the vicinity of Liverpool down south but there go). So far I've found a book group and....
A Doctor Who group.
Yes, a Doctor Who group. Yay! They meet every two weeks in a pub in Glasgow city centre (what is it with science fiction groups meeting in pubs?). The train from Paisley Gilmore Street to Glasgow Central takes about ten minutes and the meeting place is only a five minute walk from there so last Sunday I took myself along to one of their meetings to see what they were like. It kicked off at around seven-ish. Meetings like this always have an 'ish' after the proposed start time. Bit like Greek holidays.
They were very nice as it turns out. Let me put it this way, there are far worse ways to spend a Sunday evening. And there were a lot of them as well. So much so that it wasn't possible to say hello and introduce myself to all of them. The good thing is that there is always a point to reference to start the conversations with? So if you ever find yourself trying to have a chat to a Doctor Who fan, just start with these questions:
1: Who is your Doctor?
2: Who is your favourite Doctor? Note: this is NOT the same as question 1.
3: Who is your favourite companion?
4: What is your favourite episode/adventure? You'll probably get two answers here: One from the classic series and one from the new show.
And there you go! You'll have a conversation going and you're now free to wander onto different topics.
So anyway, as I was saying, those that I did chat to were very nice anyway. And I'll be going back
But, I hear you all cry, was she there? Was your impossible girl there waiting for you?
The answer to that is.....
(wait for it)
I don't know. Maybe she was and maybe she wasn't. There were a few nice ladies there so who knows.
Ta ta for now
And welcome, once again, to my little five minutes worth of insanity. Or should that be sanity? Well, anyway, you're here now so settle down and I'll begin.
So as you know, I have moved up to Scotland and have settled in Paisley. (If you didn't know, well, you do now. And where have you been?)
Well, as the flat is all sorted and work is going alright, it was time to start meeting new people and make some new friends. And maybe, just maybe, meet my impossible girl to go adventuring through time and space with.
Actually when I say the flat is all sorted, that isn't completely accurate. It's all sorted bar the music system. You see, my little friends, when I moved in I decided that as it's a small flat that a big sound system would look out of place. So I was looking for a small set up that could play the radio, cds and my ipod. Anyway my dad found one that would do all three and said that he and mum would get me it for Christmas (this was back in November/early December last year in case you're about to point out that's only just turned February). So having it got it down south we tried it with his ipod and it worked fine. Now, at this point, some of you are probably thinking that we should have tried my ipod aren't you?
And you'd probably have a point. But as his ipod is an ipod classic and my ipod is also an ipod classic you would think there wouldn't be a problem. After all, ipod is an ipod is an ipod is an ipod... (and so on).
So in the new year I dutifully returned north and plugged my ipod into the docking port on this new system.
You can guess what happened next can't you...
That's right, sod all.
Turns out that only certain makes and models of ipod are supported by this thing... and mine wasn't one of them.
There was a way round it though so I can still play the ipod until I can get a more up to date model. But still.....damn you Apple!! grrrr..
Anyway, where was I?
Oh yeah, impossible girl .
Right, so you lot know I'm a bit of geek right? Yes of course you do. Either that or you've come here by mistake in which case, sit down, make yourself comfortable, and start your catch up reading.
So I've started to look for groups similar to those interests that I was involved with down south (still feels a bit weird calling an area in the vicinity of Liverpool down south but there go). So far I've found a book group and....
A Doctor Who group.
Yes, a Doctor Who group. Yay! They meet every two weeks in a pub in Glasgow city centre (what is it with science fiction groups meeting in pubs?). The train from Paisley Gilmore Street to Glasgow Central takes about ten minutes and the meeting place is only a five minute walk from there so last Sunday I took myself along to one of their meetings to see what they were like. It kicked off at around seven-ish. Meetings like this always have an 'ish' after the proposed start time. Bit like Greek holidays.
They were very nice as it turns out. Let me put it this way, there are far worse ways to spend a Sunday evening. And there were a lot of them as well. So much so that it wasn't possible to say hello and introduce myself to all of them. The good thing is that there is always a point to reference to start the conversations with? So if you ever find yourself trying to have a chat to a Doctor Who fan, just start with these questions:
1: Who is your Doctor?
2: Who is your favourite Doctor? Note: this is NOT the same as question 1.
3: Who is your favourite companion?
4: What is your favourite episode/adventure? You'll probably get two answers here: One from the classic series and one from the new show.
And there you go! You'll have a conversation going and you're now free to wander onto different topics.
So anyway, as I was saying, those that I did chat to were very nice anyway. And I'll be going back
But, I hear you all cry, was she there? Was your impossible girl there waiting for you?
The answer to that is.....
(wait for it)
I don't know. Maybe she was and maybe she wasn't. There were a few nice ladies there so who knows.
Ta ta for now
Saturday, 25 January 2014
And we're back!
Well hello again my lovely little reader friends,
Yes, I'm back to inflict my view of the world upon you. Whether you like it or not. This time however its coming from my secret base, inside a volcano somewhere in the Pacific Ocean. Just to be on the safe side, I have also built a laser on the moon which will destroy the earth should this blog get less than 10 views.
A-ha! I hear you cry..
But surely you will perish along with everyone else should your laser on the moon destroy the earth.
Well...
Actually...
No..
Because, by the time the laser fires, I will be on my also secret moonbase surrounded by the most beautiful women in the world. See that, I've thought of everything.
So I'm either in my secret base inside a volcano in the Pacific Ocean....
Or I'm in a little flat in Paisley, Scotland.
Now, my dear reader, believe it or not, I just made one of those two locations up.
Hands up if you think it's Paisley?
So some of you thought I had a secret moonbase hmm?.
Right, so anyway, I'm now back with a fully working internet connection (with which I've already booked some theatre tickets - I'm going to see Wicked! Yay!) and now begins the second chapter of this little bit of madness in the world of the blog. And you'll love it (just think laser).
Well what else have I been getting up?
Getting used to my new work colleagues mainly. And a splendid bunch they are too. (More on them another time. Or maybe not) Christmas found me back down south (More on that another time. Or maybe not.)
So far I've found a book club in Paisley (I went to the meeting this afternoon. More on that another time. Or maybe not) and a Doctor Who group in the centre of Glasgow to occupy a bit of my time and hopefully make some new friends (the first meeting I'll go to is next weekend. More on that another time. Or.. well, you get the point). Still looking for a writing group and a badminton club but you can't do everything at once can you my little reader friends?
But we're getting there.
More soon.
Ta ta for now
Yes, I'm back to inflict my view of the world upon you. Whether you like it or not. This time however its coming from my secret base, inside a volcano somewhere in the Pacific Ocean. Just to be on the safe side, I have also built a laser on the moon which will destroy the earth should this blog get less than 10 views.
A-ha! I hear you cry..
But surely you will perish along with everyone else should your laser on the moon destroy the earth.
Well...
Actually...
No..
Because, by the time the laser fires, I will be on my also secret moonbase surrounded by the most beautiful women in the world. See that, I've thought of everything.
So I'm either in my secret base inside a volcano in the Pacific Ocean....
Or I'm in a little flat in Paisley, Scotland.
Now, my dear reader, believe it or not, I just made one of those two locations up.
Hands up if you think it's Paisley?
So some of you thought I had a secret moonbase hmm?.
Right, so anyway, I'm now back with a fully working internet connection (with which I've already booked some theatre tickets - I'm going to see Wicked! Yay!) and now begins the second chapter of this little bit of madness in the world of the blog. And you'll love it (just think laser).
Well what else have I been getting up?
Getting used to my new work colleagues mainly. And a splendid bunch they are too. (More on them another time. Or maybe not) Christmas found me back down south (More on that another time. Or maybe not.)
So far I've found a book club in Paisley (I went to the meeting this afternoon. More on that another time. Or maybe not) and a Doctor Who group in the centre of Glasgow to occupy a bit of my time and hopefully make some new friends (the first meeting I'll go to is next weekend. More on that another time. Or.. well, you get the point). Still looking for a writing group and a badminton club but you can't do everything at once can you my little reader friends?
But we're getting there.
More soon.
Ta ta for now
Sunday, 1 December 2013
There now follows.. a brief pause
Well hello my lovely reader friends,
Settle down at the back now. I know its been a while since you've last had to come this way. And it's getting close to Christmas (it's alright we can use the word now it's December) so you're all no doubt very busy
but...
I hope there are a lot of you (okay, a few of you. The odd one or two anyway. What do you mean nobody. hmmph) out there in the wilds of cyberspace wondering where I have been.
And the answer is that I'm on the move. It's one of those work based thing you know. The big bosses have had the idea to close the lab where I was working and give everyone the opportunity to move to the sister lab up in Glasgow. And I have taken that opportunity. Now for the past couple of weeks I've been travelling up and down the M6 and M74 (don't you just love the way the same stretch of road has a different name once it crosses the border), but now the time has come my little friends to move up there permanently.
So there will be a brief recess while I sort out my internet and get everything just the way I want it in my new flat.
I know you'll miss me in the short term but, fear not my reader friends, I shall return bigger and better than ever with new adventures in Paisley (where I'll be living) and the Glasgow area.
The more astute among you will notice that I've also changed the look of this blog after a few suggestions were made. It's now a bit brighter and hopefully easier on the eye. So what do you think?
Ta ta for now
Settle down at the back now. I know its been a while since you've last had to come this way. And it's getting close to Christmas (it's alright we can use the word now it's December) so you're all no doubt very busy
but...
I hope there are a lot of you (okay, a few of you. The odd one or two anyway. What do you mean nobody. hmmph) out there in the wilds of cyberspace wondering where I have been.
And the answer is that I'm on the move. It's one of those work based thing you know. The big bosses have had the idea to close the lab where I was working and give everyone the opportunity to move to the sister lab up in Glasgow. And I have taken that opportunity. Now for the past couple of weeks I've been travelling up and down the M6 and M74 (don't you just love the way the same stretch of road has a different name once it crosses the border), but now the time has come my little friends to move up there permanently.
So there will be a brief recess while I sort out my internet and get everything just the way I want it in my new flat.
I know you'll miss me in the short term but, fear not my reader friends, I shall return bigger and better than ever with new adventures in Paisley (where I'll be living) and the Glasgow area.
The more astute among you will notice that I've also changed the look of this blog after a few suggestions were made. It's now a bit brighter and hopefully easier on the eye. So what do you think?
Ta ta for now
Sunday, 6 October 2013
4th entry into Room 101
Well hello my little reader friends,
And how is everyone? I do hope you're all well. And still here waiting for my pearls of wisdom.
So anyway, this is another entry into room 101. Something that I saw on holiday a couple of weeks ago in Lanzarote but will infect any part of the world given half a chance. Something so hideously evil that in casting it screaming into the void would not only make my life better but would improve the cultural experience of everyone the world over.
They are known as:
Elvis impersonators.
Now don't get me wrong here. I like Elvis. I think he was a great singer with an incredible voice and an enduring legacy. You don't get to be known as The King Of Rock'n'Roll without doing something right now do you? And I don't suppose there will be any Justin Bieber impersonators anytime in the near future. Or the far future with any luck.
(As an aside, has anyone else had that experience when the older they get the futher back in time their taste in music is getting. I fully expect to be decrying Mozart as being too modern when I come to retire.)
So, anyway, Elvis = good. A true icon in modern culture.
But...
That does not mean that middle aged men around the world should stick on a wig, a pair of dark glasses, an Elvis fancy dress outfit and then inflict a truly abysmal rendition of his songs on an unsuspecting public. Now some of them may well be able to sing. And some may well even look a little like the man himself. But, really?
It started out so well too, my dear readers, so it did. One lunch time we went to have lunch in a bar near the villa we were staying at having had lunch there a few days previously and finding it to be very nice. There was a small poster on the wall advertising this night and the owners of the bar said that the guy was very good (ok they would say that I know). So we (the family this time, not a load of single people) decided to give it a look. The general consensus seemed to be that 'he can't be that bad'. *sigh*
So the evening arrived and taking our seats we prepared for the show. What came next... well... You know that episode of Only Fools and Horses where Trigger's mate is the nightclub singer? Well it was like that...only without the genius comedy writing and the speech impediment. To be fair, I think my evening was slightly coloured by the image mentioned. So much so I started looking round the room for a Del-boy lookalike.
And the guy didn't even stick to doing Elvis numbers! No, part way through he did a song by The Mavericks. WHY?!
So, to end this drivel, I could probably say that if you have never seen an Elvis impersonator then you should be thankful. If you have then you know what I mean. The world would be a better place without them so we can remember the king as he should be remembered.
And how is everyone? I do hope you're all well. And still here waiting for my pearls of wisdom.
So anyway, this is another entry into room 101. Something that I saw on holiday a couple of weeks ago in Lanzarote but will infect any part of the world given half a chance. Something so hideously evil that in casting it screaming into the void would not only make my life better but would improve the cultural experience of everyone the world over.
They are known as:
Elvis impersonators.
Now don't get me wrong here. I like Elvis. I think he was a great singer with an incredible voice and an enduring legacy. You don't get to be known as The King Of Rock'n'Roll without doing something right now do you? And I don't suppose there will be any Justin Bieber impersonators anytime in the near future. Or the far future with any luck.
(As an aside, has anyone else had that experience when the older they get the futher back in time their taste in music is getting. I fully expect to be decrying Mozart as being too modern when I come to retire.)
So, anyway, Elvis = good. A true icon in modern culture.
But...
That does not mean that middle aged men around the world should stick on a wig, a pair of dark glasses, an Elvis fancy dress outfit and then inflict a truly abysmal rendition of his songs on an unsuspecting public. Now some of them may well be able to sing. And some may well even look a little like the man himself. But, really?
It started out so well too, my dear readers, so it did. One lunch time we went to have lunch in a bar near the villa we were staying at having had lunch there a few days previously and finding it to be very nice. There was a small poster on the wall advertising this night and the owners of the bar said that the guy was very good (ok they would say that I know). So we (the family this time, not a load of single people) decided to give it a look. The general consensus seemed to be that 'he can't be that bad'. *sigh*
So the evening arrived and taking our seats we prepared for the show. What came next... well... You know that episode of Only Fools and Horses where Trigger's mate is the nightclub singer? Well it was like that...only without the genius comedy writing and the speech impediment. To be fair, I think my evening was slightly coloured by the image mentioned. So much so I started looking round the room for a Del-boy lookalike.
And the guy didn't even stick to doing Elvis numbers! No, part way through he did a song by The Mavericks. WHY?!
So, to end this drivel, I could probably say that if you have never seen an Elvis impersonator then you should be thankful. If you have then you know what I mean. The world would be a better place without them so we can remember the king as he should be remembered.
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